How Do I Stop Spoiling My Child?

spoiled child tantrumWhile no one sets out to raise a spoiled brat, it happens! In this day of everything being available at their finger tips, marketing being everywhere kids look and both parents working full time therefore not having as much time with their kids and more money to spend on them, there are more and more children being raising very permissively – and getting spoiled.

I am not talking about kids who try to get their way from time to time or teens that feel they have rights instead of responsibilities. That is a part of normal growing up. I’m talking about kids who never have to do chores, always place the blame elsewhere, are lavished with expensive toys and have no self-motivation to do anything about their future. Because when you spoil a child, that is what happens. They turn into someone who does not take responsibility for themselves or their actions. They never succeed in being the person they were meant to be.

You can stop spoiling your child by stopping the behaviors that lead to your child not taking responsibility and think everything is all about them, here are some tips:

Enforce limits that are age appropriate. Set them up, make the limits clear to your child and then enforce them by standing your ground. If your child complies, great! If not, follow through with the logical consequence.

Stop shielding your child from problems that come up in their lives. If they get in trouble at school, allow them to face their consequences. This is how they learn about the world around them. If you shield them, they will expect you to always shield them and that they never have to pay the piper when they do something wrong.

Give them responsibilities and make them accountable. It is as simple as giving them an age appropriate chore to complete daily and setting up a system to check that the chore has been completed. You can add rewards and consequences when you set it up – just be sure to make it all clear to your child how it is going to work. Once they get the hang of one chore, add another. Two to three simple daily chores are not too much for a child who is home at night. Teens who have other responsibilities might do better with chores that need to be completed weekly, instead.

Help your child earn what they want, instead of give it. These days are all about electronic toys. Instead of giving your child an iPad, iPhone, or other electronic device, make them earn half of the money to purchase it through doing extra chores around the house. This will teach your child that money doesn’t grow on trees, you have to earn what you enjoy.

Change the way you are acting. Are you modeling behavior that your child is mimicking? If you are not taking care of your responsibilities, you child is simply watching and learning from you. Sit down, think it through and find ways you can change for the better.

Then talk to your child or teen about it. Use these tips to keep from spoiling your child or to change the course of a spoiled child. Parents, you will be glad you did!

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