stop yelling at kids teens

Stop Yelling at Your Kids

Yelling is a signal to your kids that you are ‘out of control’. It tells them that you have run out of ideas and soon, they will get their way. And they’re probably right. Yelling is a sign of frustration and aggravation. Once parents start yelling any hope of real discipline or communication is over. There really is no need to yell unless you’re trying to attract the attention of your child when they are across a field.

You can stop yelling and have better communication with your child, every aren’t is capable of this. You simply need to know what triggers you to start the behavior in the first place. Then switch out the yelling behavior for of behavior that is more effective.

Listen first, then speak. One important aspect to remember when communicating with kids is that you have to really listen to them. I know sometimes I yell because I didn’t truly understand what my child was saying to me. And that happens when I don’t stop what I’m doing to listen to them.

Take a breath. The next time you are in a situation with your child and start to feel frustrated, take a deep breath. Tell yourself “I will not begin to yell” and mean it. Use your effective discipline skills.

Time for a parenting time-out. If you find that you are losing it take a step back and a timeout. Explain to your child that you will give them an answer in a minute, you need to take some time to calm down before you get too frustrated to deal with them.

Make sure you are okay. If you’re yelling because you are tired, get some more rest. If you aren’t sleeping at night, talk to your doctor about getting some help. If you’re working too hard, find some way to get rid of the work stress. Your moods and your behaviors affect your children. Yelling is not a successful way of parenting.

Set up a parenting contract. If the reason you begin yelling is because your child pushes your buttons until you do lose it, it’s time to put an end to that cycle. Define the behavior at starts the problem. For instance, your teen wants to go out with friends past curfew. You say no. They continue to bug and whine until you begin to yell. In this instance, being proactive would help. When you in your teen are not having an issue, sit down to have a talk. Explain to your teen that when you say no, you mean no. Let them know you don’t appreciate the whining and that the next time this happens there will be a consequence. Then follow through with what you have told them.

What is it that triggers you? What makes you yell? Please share your thoughts, advice and experiences in the comments area.

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